Ciao, Italia, we hardly knew ya.

Hoo boy, are we tired. Rome is really, really fun and really, really tiring. Did I mention that we’re tired? Oh, and we’re full. Monty Python full. But happy.

After buying jewelry and eating pizza on our first night in Rome, we tried mightily to take advantage of as many recommendations as we could. Herewith are some highlights:

Villa Farnese

Villa Farnese. Cultural and convenient!

Villa Farnese. Cultural and convenient!

This was on nobody’s recommendation list, but this medium-sized palazzo in Trastevere had something very, very important going for it – it was just outside our front door. There are days when we just can’t seem to get ourselves out the door in the morning, and by the time we do it’s afternoon. Then we feel a little bad that we’re not being more efficient with our time. On such days we try to grab the closest bit of acceptable culture that we can. Villa Farnese more than fit the bill. The palazzo was built between 1506 and 1510 for a fellow named Agostino Chigi, who was a banker from Sienna and the treasurer of Pope Julius II. The house was acquired in the late 1500s by the great grandson of Allessandro Farnese, who was Pope Paul III during the mid-1500s.

Yes, kiddies, this was during the good old days, when Popes had mistresses and children and they ordered hits on their enemies and who knows what other nonsense. While I’m wandering off on this digression, permit me to take another detour. The reason all this Farnese business is interesting to us is that part of our routine these days is to watch at least one episode of the Netflix show Borgia each evening. (Thank heavens for the geek who invented the virtual private network, or VPN, which tricks Netflix into thinking we’re in Cleveland.) At first it was what passed as preparation for our visit to Rome, but now it’s just junk food – full of sex, violence, and opulence, the visual salt, sugar, and fat that keeps binge watchers satisfied. It has some of the worst acting I’ve ever seen, but if the wifi falters on any given night I start to get the shakes. To make matters worse, we’re watching the bad Borgia – the one with some guy from Philly playing Pope Alexander, not Jeremy Irons. This is the Costco pork rinds of binge television.

Where on earth was I? Oh, yes, Villa Farnese, which is not to be confused with the more important Palazzo Farnese across the river, which is now owned by the French government and is no longer open to the public. The Villa, while something of a lesser establishment, nevertheless has a really wonderful collection of frescoes, including a famous one by Raffaello.

Rafaello's famous cherubs.

Raffaello’s famous cherubs.

We also practically had the place to ourselves, which is always a challenge even in the so-called off season in Rome, and came away feeling that we had satisfied the cultural tourism gods.

Do not try this at home, gents.

Do not try this at home, gents.

The Vatican

What can you say about the Vatican that hasn’t been said? There are seven kilometers of galleries and it’s the fifth most visited art museum in the world. I’m also kind of a baby when it comes to museums. I have a short attention span, the dust makes my sinuses run, and after a few hours I’m ready to eat. Nevertheless, you can’t come away from the Vatican museum without being impressed or overwhelmed. You’ve got your Michelangelos, Caravaggios, Titians, Berminis, Raphaels, and basically all the Renaissance art and Greek sculpture you can imagine. And then there’s the Sistine Chapel, which is all it’s cracked up to be. After weighing all the good advice about how to procure the services of a guide, we ended up going the official route – for thirty euros you can get tickets to the museum and join a group led by an official Vatican guide. I suppose you pays your money and you takes your chances, but our guide was amazingly enthusiastic and quite terrific. Two thumbs up for the Vatican.

Santa Maria degli Angeli e dei Martiri

Our friend Hubert recommended this really interesting church, which began its life as a Roman bathhouse and was converted to its present use by Michelangelo in 1563. This wasn’t a bathhouse like in an Al Pacino movie, though. It is said that the Baths of Diocletian could accommodate three thousand Romans at any given time. In fact, the church, which is massive, was built just from a portion of the bath complex, the frigidarium, the cold bath. There was also a caldarium, which was a pool heated by a big furnace, as well as other pools and rooms and spaces where Romans could be Roman together.

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The church also has a nifty meridian – a long line built in the floor that is aligned with a hole in the roof that serves as a giant sundial calendar. I wasn’t particularly good at math or science, and I’m always mystified at feats of genius like these.

Finally, the thrifty part of me always loves the free churches. 🙂

Gallery Borghese

Our friend Hillary recommended the Gallery Borghese, a palazzo built to house the art collection of Cardinal Scipione Borghese, who was Pope Paul V’s nephew. After the pope’s election, Scipione was made secretary to the pope and the head of the Vatican government. Borghese used the position to make himself and his family very wealthy, and he spent some of his booty on art. In other words, the Borghese family made the Borgias look like the people on Duck Dynasty. And hoo boy did they collect art. The place is stuffed full of paintings and sculpture, the highlights of which are extraordinary sculptures by Bermini, who makes marble look like silk. They do a decent job of managing the crowds there by selling two hour tickets and then clearing out the gallery at the end of the period, like they do at baseball doubleheaders these days.

A pretty good Bernini.

A pretty good Bernini.

That’s it, you ask? Um, yup, basically. We were also invited to spend our last two nights in Rome at the very nice digs of a friend of a friend, which was delightful. We were also invited to crash a reception. Thanks to our very efficient packing, we were ready for such an occasion – Janine looked lovely in her cocktail ensemble, and I even had a jacket and tie in my bag of tricks.

Of course, we also had to eat, and I include a couple of quick reviews.

Ditirambo Ristorante

This place sits just off the Campo de Fiori near our apartment in Trastevere. We waltzed in without a reservation, got the only available table, and were treated to a gracious and quite delicious meal. We started with a simple salad of shaved fennel, oranges, and pomegranate. Our primi was the classic Roman pasta tonnarelli cacio e pepe. It’s as simple as gets – they make a sauce out of cheese, black pepper, and the starchy salty water the pasta cooks in, and this version was spectacular. They call it tonnarelli because the pasta, which is basically a fat spaghetti, looks like a tuna. (The Italians are so evocative. There’s a pasta called orecchiette, or “little ears,” and a dish called strozzapretti, or “strangle the priest.”) The main was a splendid suckling pig – roasty, crispy, and just the right amount of fatty. Dessert was a lovely sponge cake topped with a poached pear with a dandy pasty crème on the side. The service was gracious and lovely and the food was terrific, and with a bottle of delicious pinot nero from Alto Adige, the whole thing came to less than sixty euros. Go there.

Hosteria da Corrado

Our host in Trastevere recommended this one. There are various levels of fanciness in Italy – ristorante, trattoria, and the homey osteria. In many of them, like Hostaria da Corrado, there’s no menu. You sit down, somebody rattles off maybe two or three choices for a starter and a main (in Italian, natch), and you’re off to the races. We had another classic roman dish rigatoni all’amatriciana, which is a tomato sauce made with cured pork jowls (close your eyes and it’s just really good bacon), and a thin pan-cooked steak that they hammer to a medium well, but which was fatty and salty enough to be somehow perfect. This is cooking like you wish your grandma did, and you have the benefit of watching locals come and go. The owner knew each of his customers (except us and one other brave table) by name. it was a little slice of Roman life.

Ristorante Compagnucci

Finally, we end on a meal that kept on going. Ristorante Compagnucci is a neighborhood place out by the Appian Way that was recommended by a friend. We made the minor mistake of just asking them to bring us what they thought was good without placing any volume limits, and the food just kept coming. Fried anchovies, more pasta all’amatriciana, octopus and green bean salad, and some kind of fish. It was all great, but way too much (how DO people eat this much this late?) although the highlight of the evening was the server. Her family owns the restaurant, and she only works there once in a while. Her English was good, and we struck up a very nice conversation. The short version of the story is that we invited her and her family to visit us if they make it to San Francisco. Such is the way of travel.

And that’s Italy. There’s so much to do in Rome, much less Italy, that I always leave feeling exhausted but strangely unrequited. I have seen the Sistine Chapel, though, which was the goal in the first place. And we ate pretty well.

Next up – Athens, and then Istanbul. If you have suggestions, please weigh in!

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